Train yourself to trust yourself

Here’s the good news: You can train yourself to trust yourself.

One simple (and not always easy) way to do this is to honor your word.

Do what you say you’ll do. Keep your promises. Show up when you say you’re going to.

Here’s what not doing this looks like:

• Telling yourself on Sunday you’re going to get to the gym three times this week, then only going once.

• Telling your friend you’re in for dinner, then canceling the day before.

• Telling your team the meeting starts at 10:00am, then logging on at 10:06am.

The circumstantial details don’t matter. The point is, when you say you’re going to do things and then fail to follow through, you’re sending a message to yourself that you can’t count on yourself.

If that’s your pattern, your brain isn’t going to believe you when you want to take bigger swings in life.

When you don’t trust yourself to follow through on daily promises, how can you believe you’ll do what it takes to become a successful entrepreneur? Or support yourself after leaving an unhappy marriage? Or handle the criticism that comes from putting your creative work into the world?

Staying the same is easier because it’s familiar.

If you want to expand beyond your status quo life, you have to earn your own trust.

The more you show up for yourself by doing the things you say you’re going to do, the more trust you develop in yourself.

When you train yourself to trust yourself, it becomes easier to take leaps, to step outside your comfort zone, to believe you’ll figure it out.

Trusting yourself doesn’t mean knowing all the answers and never making mistakes. It means knowing mistakes are inevitable, taking action anyway, and believing you’ll be okay no matter what.

When you have your own back—and only then—anything is possible.